
As I mentioned earlier in my post on bra tips and tricks, I have rather large breasts. This aspect of my body is neither here nor there; I was born, I grew up, and somewhere along the way my chest went from a Semi-Visible B to a size Can’t Squeeze Past People On The Subway DDD. Even though I’m totally down with my big boobs these days, there are plenty of things that happen on a regular basis that I can’t imagine occurring had I been granted much smaller ones. If you’re a large-chested lady and can relate, these 20 annoying things are a shout-out to you.
- Having to hold your boobs as you walk down the stairs.
- Needing two sports bras when you work out.
- …Because otherwise, they are in actual danger of whacking you in the chin.
- People assuming you’re humblebragging when you mention having trouble fitting clothes over your chest.
- Dropping food down them. Whoops!
- How annoying cross strap bags are to wear.
- The phrase, “Anything more than a handful is a waste.”
- BOOB SWEAT.
- Assumptions that you are “slutty” or “trashy” whenever you wear an outfit that shows even a slight big of cleavage.
- Literally getting kicked out of places because of your boobs…while smaller breasts can “get away” with the exact same outfits. Ugh.
- Never being able to wear strapless dresses.
- Getting told by people to enjoy your big breasts now because later on, they’ll be saggy (as though you and your boobs’ ego need to put in their place).
- That stupid gap between your upper buttons because your shirt shrank and now your boobs are about to pop out.
- Going to a lingerie store and all the small bras are like.
- Using your boobs as a place to rest plates or wine glasses. (Okay, this one’s actually just awesome.)
- People asking outright if you have big nipples.
- The fact that “built-in” bras are never actually bras for you.
- Whenever people assume you like the attention you get from your breasts.
- Friends grabbing at them because they’re OMG JUST SO BIG.
- The way cute baby doll dresses just look like you’re about to have a baby when you wear them.
- People asking you “where you got your boobs.”
- How your boobs sunburn before your face does.
- Trying to squeeze by people at a crowded party without rubbing your chest against them. (It’s impossible.)
- People calling them “melons,” “jugs” or any other weird name.
- Anything sold at Urban Outfitters was absolutely not made with the intention of fitting your boob type.