Proper communication is essential for long-term relationship success. What comprises ‘proper’ or good communication, however, is defined differently by each individual. Some feel that teasing and sarcasm are essential to positive interactions, while others require long, drawn-out intimate conversations on a regular basis to feel connected. What follows are 20 questions essential for all dating couples to ask each other in order to get a better feel for each person’s communication style.
- Which are you better at, and why: listening or speaking?
- Are debate and disagreement something you are comfortable with? Why or why not?
- What is your preferred method of communication, and why? (i.e., email, in-person)
- How do you feel, or what do you do when there is silence in a conversation?
- How frequently (or infrequently) do you like talking about your relationship?
- How accessible are you, or do you want to be – by phone, email, or other means?
- Are there certain topics or subjects you prefer talking about over others?
- How do you feel about cursing and strong language?
- How and when do you feel comfortable expressing difficult feelings?
- How frequently do you like or want to communicate? Daily, hourly, weekly, or…?
- How do you feel about being interrupted? Do you interrupt others?
- What kind of humor do you appreciate and/or use in daily conversation?
- How do you communicate when you are upset if you do at all?
- What do you feel about eye contact when speaking to another person?
- What sort of time frame do you employ to respond to emails or phone calls?
- Are you able to talk to me while doing other things?
- If something is bothering you, how long will it take you to bring it up?
- What, if any, are your taboo or off-limits topics?
- Do you feel you have any communication skills that need to be worked on?
- Do you feel safe sharing your secrets or personal issues with me?
