When the weather started to warm up last spring, I wanted nothing more than to dye my hair powder pink and spend the summer feeling like Demi Lovato. But it’s not summer anymore, and fall calls for something more sleek, sophisticated, and fashionable. Fall calls for gray clothes, leather boots, and red hair.
- You will be in good company: Some of the best, coolest, and sexiest celebrities in the world are those who dyed their hair red. Go for red hair, and you will instantly feel part of an exalted sisterhood that includes Christina Hendricks, Emma Stone, and Amy Adams.
- We have the technology: Speaking of Emma Stone and Amy Adams, it should be clear by now that red hair dye technology is an advanced science. Gone are the days when fake redheads looked obvious. Now you can buy a shade so realistic strangers will come up and offer you SPF 50.
- Countless opportunities to vent your rage: Ever wanted to just throw something for no reason? Dye your hair red, and just wait for the inevitable tool to show up and ask if “the carpet matches the drapes.” Then you are justified in saying, “Are you asking me about my vagina?” and throwing things to your heart’s content.
- It’s easy to DIY: Going blonde on your own is a risky proposition, but there are a ton of great box dyes for red.
- You don’t have to go natural: Fire-engine red exists, and a good black cherry is perfectly bold and dramatic for fall.
- It goes great with fall clothes: Red hair goes best with fall’s gray, navy, green, and oxblood colors.
- It comes with a nickname: If you’re bored with your name, this is an excellent first step on the road to becoming “Red” or “Pepper” or “Penny.”
- You will be the only redhead on the beach: All the natural redheads will be hiding out in the bar until dusk to avoid sunburns, so you will own that beach all by yourself.
- You will gain a new appreciation for the Pre-Raphaelite wing of the museum: The Pre-Raphaelites would have loved you.
- Your favorite Disney princess will be Ariel: Bookish girls like Belle, but all redheads are Team Ariel, even the bookish ones.
- You will only be confused for famous and beautiful people: Brunettes might get confused for Aunt Hilda from Sheboygan, and blondes might be mistaken from Caroline from Sales, but as a redhead, you will only be confused for Christina Hendricks, or maybe Alyson Hannigan.
- You will become geek catnip: Bros might prefer blondes, but if you are a redhead, then ComicCon is your oyster. All your OKCupid matches will suddenly have very strong opinions about Game of Thrones, and that’s not necessarily a bad thing.
- You’ll get old someday: You’ll never be younger than you are right now, so you might as well take the plunge as soon as possible.
- Your work can’t say anything about it: No matter how conservative your office is, they can’t get mad at you for going red.
- Prince Harry is still single: This way you will have something in common.
- It’s temporary: If you don’t like it, get rid of it.
- Hair grows: Dying your hair is not like a nose job or a tattoo.
- People will think you have a totally different personality: Red is just a hair color, not a personality. But people will still think you’re fiery and exciting. You might as well run with it.
- It is the most special hair color: Red just wins every time.
- Everyone can go red: Just like there is a red lipstick for every person, so too is there a red hair color. You just need to find it.
