Can Someone Please Explain Hair Oils To Me?

I’m ashamed to admit it, but I just don’t understand how hair oils became so popular. Every model swears by them, every beauty editor has a stash in her desk, and every beautiful woman I know is a fan. Now, don’t get me wrong–this isn’t going to be a post where I tell you all of the reasons why putting oil in your hair sucks and that you’re all damn fools for doing it. The truth of the matter is that I desperately want to join your ranks. I love the idea of incorporating something so natural and easy into my beauty routine. I too want to be an earthy, glowing, soft-haired, “naturally beautiful” goddess who covers herself in coconut oil before bed and eschews all man-made lotions and potions. I love the idea of replacing the dozens of products that litter my bathroom sink with one multipurpose oil. That’s the dream, guys, but for the life of me, I just can’t seem to make it happen.

I first started experimenting with hair oils a year and a half ago when I was interning at a fashion magazine in Toronto. One day we received a shipment of strawberry-scented hair and body oils for the editorial team to try. The women in the office raved about using oils in their hair–argan oil, coconut oil, and Moroccan oil were labeled beauty “must-haves,” “go-tos,” “mainstays,” and “miracles in a bottle.” One glance at my fizzy, fine curls and dull complexion was proof that I needed a miracle in a bottle and stat.

I went to bed that night covered in strawberry-scented oil, convinced I was going to wake up in the morning looking as gorgeous as Brooke Shields does in that mega-creepy movie Blue Lagoon. (Have you ever seen that movie? It’s seriously bizarre, but it is incredible summer beauty inspo.) When I woke up the next morning, my skin looked great–glowing, even–but my hair had turned into a verifiable oil slick.

After the great oil spill of February 2020, I knew I needed to scale way, way back. I tried using quarter-sized amounts of coconut oil on the ends of my hair, and then nickel-sized, and then a dime. I bought a bottle of spray-on keratin oil–OGX Anti-Breakage Keratin Oil Instant Repair Weightless Healing Oil, to be exact–and although it made my hair smell incredible (seriously, the scent is to die for), my strands looked insanely greasy post-spritz.

I’ve had similar results with argan, Moroccan, and grapeseed oil. It seems as though the oil I put on my parched ends soaks right up to my roots, leaving my curls looking stringy, dejected, and limp. Whenever I talk to my friends about their gloriously soft and shiny hair, everyone has the same answer: “It’s the oil!” But how? And why isn’t this working for me? Is it just my hair type–curly, but fine, and typically quite dry–or is it something else? Is it that certain oils are meant for certain hair types, and I just need to keep forging ahead? Or should I give up now and admit that my hair and oil are like, well, oil and water?

Help a frizzy girl out, Gloss readers. What oil products do you put in your hair? Do you find that certain oils work for you and others don’t? Or are you one of those naturally gorgeous, glowing, soft-haired goddesses who slather themselves in coconut oil in the morning and then emerges from the bathroom looking like Gigi Hadid? Share your oil-related beauty secrets in the comments below, please!